Monday, April 6, 2009


“I was once again hit by the maddening curse that has reared its ugly head again and, considering all my pain and suffering, how it makes me laugh hysterically, but then this girl in her rags at the traffic signal surely enough beats me to it....savor me!
damn you, damn you, for sucking my fun away...the dragon inside my head wants to unleash roaring and spitting out fire relentlessly - no voice of plea's of the heart seem to be having an effect on this predator who has invaded my brain neurons inch by inch...the marauder had turned his deaf ears to my appeals and was headstrong in burning me to ashes. I was helpless, I find all doors ahead of me closed, I have no one around to help me out of this mad abduction by a seething, furious demon.”


I snap-shut the blaring alarm without willing to even get my head out of the covers.
This is probably the 8th time I am having the same dream, which stopped abruptly at the same place on all 8 times when I had it.

I am now trying to figure out what it means. What could it possibly mean to the aggravating emptiness in my life of late and the lack of happiness as a whole, losing the touch of a fulfillment factor to serve the purpose of life?

There’s everything but there’s nothing.
So many things and so little happiness.
It’s like you are in an ocean and are looking for purified/clean water to drink!


The month of September-08 had been eventful for me. Both in professional and personal terms. Personally because end of September meant just two more months left with me before I turn into a Missus from a Miss status. But then life was never always the same with whatever people had to do in their profession. Such is the providence of life.

On a not so emotional note, and on a lighter vein, when I happened to check my salary credited for this month online, I was shocked to see my salary credited twice in to my account. Check this snapshot below, for those that dont believe my words and have that smug smile on their face reading this.......

For a crazy second, the monster inside my head let out that villainous laugh, elated with the site of the extra “$$$$” materialized into my otherwise unexciting and lean salary account.
Just when I was getting myself soaking with the momentary visual pleasure, to my utter disbelief, I saw the page getting reloaded/refreshed on its own only to show the new transaction item as a Debit of the extra salary that was mistakenly credited for the second time into my account!

Dohh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So much for a momentary cloud-nine experience :-P

Sunday, April 5, 2009

How Do You Relate To Your Partner?

  • Sometimes you need to make a lot of friends and influence or attract people with your spontaneous indulgence of quick wits and on-the-fly-street-smartness.
    Other times, you should just test drive them and push their buttons, to see their real performance.

    The art of irritation can, in fact, be just as valuable as the art of persuasion. How so? Let’s start with the problem: people are good liars and actors…but remember, only up to a point where in they have reached the saturation point, where-in the elasticity gives-up snapping at your face smugly.

    What if it were possible to fast-forward relationships, whether with new friends, business partners, or romances?

    What if in a mad pace life’s frames just roll by to get past the celebratory fascia of minutiae and let us see their true tendencies underneath all those bitter-sweety or sweet-poisony relationships?

    I’ve been experimenting with methods of “Tearing the veil apart” or “Ripping the mask off” as you might say, and after all those back-breaking, mind-numbing, number-crunching statistical bar graphs and pie charts that I had to come-up with on “Behavioral Analysis of Male Sapiens”, I here by conclude that, this test can be carried out successfully without having to pawn out your entire life, in the process of understanding or getting to know each other completely, just like those underdone blocks of bricks staggering all the way through their life, until the last minute, being under a stumbling down building. A hedgehog must know better than to befriend a fox and get peed on before getting preyed on!

    Relationships comes out with a price-tag of supreme attention and time, and I would rather want only those people in my life, whose personalities and intentions will uplift and strengthen me instead of draining and demoralizing me.

    Identifying problems early begins with recognizing a banality:

    Dealing with adversities doesn’t primarily build one’s character— it ONLY reveals it.
    Therefore, by putting someone under pressure or in a difficult situation, you can pull back those glossy and dazzling outer covers and get a glimpse of what’s lying beneath, that would surface a few months or years down the line. And because little things are smaller samplings of the big boulder sized things, you can always choose to do the Sampling Test.

    These tests may include simple things like,
  • Judging how they react to last minute changes in your dinner/date plans.
  • Gauging their reactions to sudden/unexpected monetary crisis situations, like making them pay for your treat in the last minute, as you realize and apologize profusely that you have forgotten your wallet at home. As the adage goes, some wonderful human beings turn into irrational idiots for matters involving few bucks.
  • Testing their patience at public places where-in you have to wait for long to get your turn for the service in a Q-line or at a restaurant.
  • Trying to figure how they react to a loud-mouthed or dominating family member of yours.
  • Evaluate their biases against specific races and social classes, which are usually fast to emerge after there is any unexpected physical contact. Take them somewhere extremely crowded where they’ll be inadvertently bumped, preferably where they are exposed to people of different races and of lower socio-economic classes.
  • Assess their determination for hygiene, sanitation and need for quality over quantity by suggesting to go to a dirty-local-crowded-cheap-cost market for shopping.
  • Weigh-up their takes on the most disagreeing topics. By exploring the most controversial topics until you come across a subject that you both find most conflicting.

    Being civil, good at listening, weighing the pros and cons of a subject in discussion, being unbiased in making decisions, being a bull when provoked for having healthy arguments which brings out the intellectual thinking in both of you and finding avenues for compromises as soon as the topic drifts away from its predefined boundaries. One needs to be good at identifying a common ground for both parties to agree upon while still fighting for their stand in reasonable cases, and laughing off the unimportant ones. Take care not to lose control of their emotions by making hurtful personal attacks or generalizations. Do not take on guilt or other negative emotions instead of discussing things logically. Ensure not to hold personal grudges to be held-back for future-stabbing purposes.

    Needless to say, no one sane would recommend you to shove all of these into a single meeting with your potential partner (well, not unless you want a purple striped cheek), but the hypothesis is pretty simple if you look at it: life is both too long and too short to suffer through noxious relationships. The sooner we have an accurate read on someone, the better. Rather than hoping for the best and getting trapped in relationships you are unwilling to end due to guilt and indolence, you can test drive using a few specific situations and get a taste of what’s awaiting. One could realize how revealing the above scenarios were while traveling, as they came up geologically with the inevitable mix-ups and occasional bouts of bad luck. It makes one to wonder, if you can go about glimpsing someone’s true personality in a more reliable way? That said, there is no need to organize bad service at a restaurant, for example, if you can achieve the same output doing something fun but uncontrolled. A good long weekend of getting lost with someone will reveal most of the character you need to see. Just ensure you expose them to adverse conditions or awkward situations, to make the best of it.
    Most people spend a lot of time planning their weekends than the status or importance of their relationships. Don’t be the one to commit the same mistake. You are an average of the kind of people you associate yourself with most. Make your choices to reflect the wisdom you possess.