Thursday, November 6, 2008

On Choices & Priorities....

I've lived most of my life having only one option in my hand, I never had many choices, and even if I had one, things/situations/events just seemed to point in only one direction. So I never did too much proactive thinking on the choices I need to make with my life. And sophistication to me always meant the ultimate zenith instead of an elixir. One of my friends rightly called me as a dame who dwells in the past.

I thought that was the way life is going to be, whenever I used to plan anything, things never got executed in the same way, the way I expected them to be. So I started expecting the worst, after all how low can things get. It took me a while to get over with that kind of living, where you can never dream of something and eventually realize them. And after all these years now, I'm still the same dame who lives in the past, just that the memories are bittersweet, and I cherish the time I had spent over the last decade, which defined me into whatever that I am to this day. And I look forward to spending the time in the same way, and much better in certain areas where I need progression, as a learning from the past :-)

However, I'm starting to get confused now. I'm used to doing things in the only-possible-way mode. Now I have a few options which I need to ponder upon, and make a decision. And I'm not able to do that. Is that what one calls “Lack of Experience”? I don't understand how people can prioritize things, how they can put something on hold for some time, and carry on as if nothing has happened. I always wondered, How can I do a thing, turn around and forget it for sometime, while I do something "more important"…..And then afterwards turn around yet again to resume from where I paused with the earlier one… Pretty confusing eh? But I rather find it a tough one to handle.

Well, the good news is, I'm learning...S.L.O.W.L.Y!

One of my friends recently said:

“I don't want to change my life coz something has happened. I still want to hang-out with my friends they way I did whenever and wherever I could, I still want to sleep till Sunday afternoon and have my breakfast/lunch on bed watching Cricket/F1/Football and see my favorite teams win. I still want to call up friends and talk to them till early mornings. But I realize life is more than just about these things. And I ought to learn how to put things in different perspectives at different times and act accordingly.”

This isn’t probably something like an immature man turning into a mature mode becoming a oh-I-am-so-responsible from this day till I die, at a click of a button.

And in this process of putting something’s in front and something’s in the back, we end up disappointing people or at least some.

While at school I never could buy the idea of studiousness and freak-out nature would go hand in hand. To me they were two extremes that can’t fit in to the frame when one is already in. Getting into college when I saw the batch topper partying like mad, having all the “Funs” of life without having to miss any of the academics at the time kind of stunned me to an extent, to speak the truth. I did not believe it could happen until I witnessed it myself.

Someone gives me a definition from behind me while I am typing this, calling out “This is what is called as “Dynamism” or “Versatility”, in cricket All-Rounders have it. It’s like when you know the game know-it-all, leave no gaps!”. I turn around to see it was one of my friendly colleagues who was waiting for me to accompany him for lunch.

“Interesting, I don’t think I am still a versatile person..” I said.

He smiles and replies “ I don’t think so. You are wrong. You probably are not aware that you are capable of multitasking. You are of course versatile, otherwise how could you manage to come-up with a post as well as the tasks for a day that you need to accomplish as your work demands”
Thoughtfully I descend the steps, as I still couldn’t relate to it clearly enough!

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