Rebelliously Non-Rebel

A story from one of my friends........said in my words......

Some people just don’t change. No matter how much ever one tries to knock some sense into their jammed head that comprises of a pea-sized brain which had stopped functioning effectively – god knows since when!

This very thing is applicable for X who has been insistently decided upon religiously following every other onlooker’s advises and paying heed to their remarks which are mostly negative and had tenaciously determined to being dragged along all directions in the sole pursuit of happiness. End result; a lot of money wasted, a lot of time wasted, a lot of energy resources wasted ensuing in nothing fruitful but for a series of maniacal and maddening wrangles with her two teenage daughters and her husband by raising trivial distinctions and objections leading to unsolvable quibbles. Then starts a series of sophomoric wailing by each of the ladies in the home demeaning themselves to an abysmal degree which includes calling out names subsequently followed by the disdainful suicidal threats and unsuccessful attempts; all of which adding more to the already gloomy disposition of the entire family!

X had always been the dependent one on other clan members, right from her childhood. She was just a kid then; when it all started, all those stealthy pampering and wooing she was doused with, by all her siblings and parents. She was barely 3 when she lost her father being the last of the 6 children their parents attributed to, it was not much of an impact on her as she was still enticed with all the goodies that she got from the rest of her family.

It was not the destiny that had it the way she is today, I strongly believe it’s their family that had her cast the way she was and still is. Left alone, she could have turned into a strong-like-stone and cold-as-ice woman rather then being dwindled across!

It’s not her mistake that she has turned out to be a pain-in-the-wrong-place for the very own clan members who once cajoled and spoiled her since her childhood. Little bit of a foresight could have been resourceful back then but it just did not strike any one when they were overwhelmed by her innocence and ignorance which they took to be puerile nature of a usual last born of large families.

But then things never changed drastically even after her marriage which came close to becoming a disaster more then twice already with in the first few years of their matrimonial entwining – All due to monetary issues, now that’s almost like global problem isn’t it?

X's husband lost his job soon after their marriage and post getting her pregnant twice for the two daughters they possess today. First it was the fight for getting pregnant, then it was for a male clan with the expectation as a symbol of reinforcement of an extended family tree for the generations to come and when it did not happen for the second time too, they had already had enough of it and had even gone to the extent of selling off their second baby girl in the disguise of adoption for a lump sum amount; pity the poverty stricken X.

When that did not happen due to the wistful interference of X's siblings, (thank god the girl remains intact with her parents till date!) they had to let go of any such absurdities in the name of bright-ideas to chase-out-poverty. Since then for nearly 24 long years her family had been supported by her siblings on all occasions ensuring that she didn’t miss anything that’s quintessential and mandatory need for successful running of the family-wheel.

Clothes, Books, Jewels, Currency and many more material needs were taken care of all these years by hook or crook, by tears or cheers, by blase or haste! At the end of every such episode she smiled teary eyed, and that’s just all her brothers and sisters wanted to see always in her, that happy and contented smile. She was nice, indeed very indebted to all those who helped her whenever she was in trouble (and trouble always chased her around like a shadow!) and that made her all the more nicer topping it to her predominant naïve-ness.

What surprises me till date is the tirelessness of X and the undying creativity of her husband. There were a variety of folk tales (mostly non-existent) her husband had consistently conjured up till date all of them reasoning a single moral; a successful married life lay in the hands of a woman, who must stand-up against all odds of financial, mental and other indescribable physical ailments and yet must come out in flying colors with a whopping victory, which X did with-out fail for all these twenty four years being a dutiful & devoted wife!

Somehow none of these had staunched X from loving her husband and being thankful to god for having gifted with such a wonderful heart that cares for her and for her well-being.

The embryonic hatred that had grown over the years in her daughters begged them to be different from their mom in all aspects, which both the kids did try to the best of their knowledge until very recently; when her first daughter fell prey to the so-called
Arranged-Marriage-Saga set-up by the relatives of a deprived parents, moved her slowly to start asking for essential things as take-away from home for starting-up a married life, which eventually turned out to be an ostentatious and unruly demands by the time the wedding bells rang this morning finally!!!

Something to be detested for life taught and recited many times over since childhood… “Do not depend on any one for anything!!”.. all turning into futile efforts; All that was to be hated and disliked have now been inherited directly from a mother, with in no time by a daughter, who was fighting to be a rebel and wished as a last thing to be like her mother, X– Reborn, I sighed and shut-off the thoughts……

Hard Habits!

There’s this guy that I know of for quite sometime now that constantly reminds me of an elderly person whom I know personally for a long time, probably, ever since I was conscious of relations.

Both of them are so dangerously identical that they both take no effort in bugging me, pissing me off relentlessly.

I maybe doing a wrong thing in writing this up making a fool out of myself when read by someone I know so damn well that they would easily make things out as to who I am referring to here.

But then what am I to do when I’ve got no one to crib to about this?

I remember someone not so old, but definitely wiser than I am, told me that a blog can come to one’s rescue as a handy tool for venting out frustration free of cost!

Although the purpose of writing, the degree of intensity in the content rendered, the objective of the umbrage intended in the context and the target audience for the verbal outrage and much more greatly varies from person to person and is purely a circumstantial one at it; the odds of it being true are purely factual.

The purpose of writing is to inflate weak ideas, make ones reasoning abilities more murky and inhibit the amount of clarity and clairvoyance one has, was again said by someone that I don’t even seem to remember….

With a little practice writing can be an intimidating and impenetrable fog says the other…unable to name the unnamed…..

Now coming back to the point, both these men that I am talking about here are extremely identical with not a shred of difference in continually failing to keeping up their promises.

Especially when I never ask for a promise and they choose to do it so voluntarily and finally end up making me look like a fool for having believed their yet another
make-believe story of a so-called “Promise”

It’s always better to know things at the first strike rather than making the other person assume, attach and associate good tags to your name and in the end let everything shatter into a mass of nothingness.

With expectations comes every damned disgruntle and displeasure that would blow up the entire conviction.

Knowing things before is always better than knowing them at the time of crisis – I keep repeating this to both the men, but, why …Why on earth would they pay heed to my words now, they haven’t trained doing it anytime before ?

Anyways so I decide that I’m too tired after countless repetitions of the same advices over and over again, several iterations of the same; greater than the repetitive occurrences. I shrug and I give up.

Work Vs Rating

It's always difficult to gauge things from the way they look like, for one, there is the clichéd “looks always deceive” factor and the other and most significant part of it being, there is a lot of room being left open to fit into that tiny space much suitably with sometimes ridiculous and mostly incredible things upon perceptions, premeditated convictions, conceptualization of things based on past experiences and/or views emanating from sordid philosophy.

Conversely, its oblivion though to what extent of truth is held in the context container, to help feed the hunger struck and needy bunch strayed across the space that always got the pessimist side of the container, frowning scornfully always to complain about the minimum or exhaustible contents held in the container.

Mulling over the same subject, I had this time a not-so-transitory thought fleeting across my mind which rings; Do those hopeless things which were the ceremonial farewell outcome of the innumerous insomniac nights spent jabbing away endlessly and overstretching the brains more than its elasticity could have allowed for, teach me something new? A lesson to learn from?

I was as good as dead, when I first heard it as it left me shattered and next to nothing.
Was that all to it, for so much of me and my semi-human cum zombie friend who used to take in all that I gave without protesting and heard all those swear words and curses patiently, yet helping me finish the job no matter however late it was!

----- Picked up from my diary.

This entry was made the same night after I got a 3 rating for the work I did in the year 2004-2005.

Loneliness....

I am fat, ugly, rounded and oversized. But does that make me a negative person? Hell, no!

It is a plague. It gets all over you before you realize it, and bang it’s already too late. You are completely drenched in it choking to get outa it, but there’s no way out; it’s like a panic room. Unless you know the pass code you just remain there locked up all your life till your senses fail you. With all doors blocked leaving the little chances of your getting out to the external world; You are boomed!

It starts off on a high-note. Takes you to a different plight altogether, a feeling that’s inexplicable, a feeling that’s heavenly, a feeling that secludes you from the outside world, a feeling that leaves you isolated and obsolete. It’s like a slow diffusing killer poison, however when it starts you are on a lofty pedestal soaring high superciliously having no bother about your direction, the red alerts you get inside your head are brushed aside and you keep elevating, the feeling is like that of a slow, long, silky, smooth and eternal drag of a cigar and when you are done your body loosens up, you feel dizzy, the world around you is on a whirl, your eyes see no more of the reality, they see no more of where you must actually belong, they keep egging on your dizziness to take you into a land of clandestine.

And then the ugly plague takes over, insomnia is your everlasting buddy, you seek no humans, you seek no living beings around you, the emotions that touched your life are farther away and you don’t feel the need of it anymore. And it’s not over yet!

You swell with bitter thoughts lingering all over your mind, there’s no escape, no matter how hard you push them away they keep coming back to you. Negativity then is just an understatement. You become a certified pessimist and get branded for the same. Sadism finds refuge in your heart, you welcome it with no second thoughts, perverse thoughts and insane ideas keep tugging at you to drag you on to their side, the more you kick them away they only jump a few feet away to get cloned more in number of their own clan and continue tugging at you from all directions.....

You are then susceptible to those condensed concoction of voluminous cynicism dripping over your head drenching you head-to-feet until you are soaked and contaminated with the contagious disease successfully.

Truth is even the most transient and avaricious stricture like your looks could kill the residual acumen enhancing your faculty of senses could get a different picture when you lock yourself up in a dark room void of electricity and try to justify that you are in a “DARK WORLD”!

I wish I could whisper into her ears “Snap out it sweetheart, before the monster strikes you to death!”

On an Orkut's Section.....

That very section on the Orkut's profile sounded very intriguing to me in some strange yet relatable manner. Umm....indeed it's even insightful over a couple of rereads on some of my friends profiles.... if you know what I mean! :-)

It need not necessarily match the person's real personality or attitude, for all you know it may just be a classy set of words scrambled-up together to give that check-it-out-dude kinda effect!

Having said that, it's not quite uncommon to see people writing at length of the things in their heart illustrating their real & current statuses of their lives in a public forum such as this, and that which is decidedly prone to be viewed by anyone and everyone around the world.

Consciously or not, clicks on that personal tab and couple of scrolls down the screen to get to that very section has become a kind of obsession so to speak. You probably aren't really upto anything here by checking that section out, nor do you want to make sure that the person isn't too swamped already in that area, yet it could just be that silly, moronic & juvenile instincts getting the better of your wisdom everytime and pushing you into it!

It rather amazes me if the founder of this site would have practically given so much of thought-process going into it, when the bulb-of-invention glowed above his head, pushing him about creating this small section on Orkut called "Things I learnt from my previous Relationships"

So many Blogs?

Blogs, Blogs everywhere.... Not a single one that's readable .. Ha Ha :-D

I am no master piece.... I am no exception to all those that wriggle, snuggle, struggle & also huddle to one corner holding on tight to the oxford dictionary with sleeves rolled-up to the arms, ears more sharper than ever and eyes more intent & keen to match the action with the word that was being described; everytime the cricket commentator on an old n blurry "Solidaire" B&W TV that relayed more noise than intelligible sound; nevertheless blurted out almost decipherable words like "Magnificent Shot" "Splendorous hit".... "Bangggg - What a swanky shot that was" .....working with the hands much faster to look-up the alphabhet first...then the first syllable, then the actual word....during all these painstaking minutes of manual search, ensuring to repeat the word infinitely in an effort of not forgetting the new heard word.

I learnt what I write today, the hard way. This is no "Speak Your Mind" post that's coming up here....But one can assume that its being conjured-up to justify the very primitive, grammatical and typo error filled posts that one may come across in the oldest of my blogs :)

I never took an effort to go-over and tweak it, cos, this one's like my dairy... I cannot go-about tearing sheets from the diary (if it was one) just cos, I erred spelling-wise or grammatically that it staggered a lot to consider my entry to be passable to stay there. Nor would I go about striking out to make changes to correct the sentences, and in the process loose out on the actual essence of my writing!

So, I wouldn't insult either. Neither the Diary nor the Entry.

See below ........Unfolding the truth about a hard-learner.......that is still waiting to go a long way

Well, this one's got coupla good posts....... Alter Ego!
Almost 4 years back, outa college..... Jobless & Useless
I wonder if such a blog existed..... Long Long Ago - Juvenile Days
Oh, well - this one's a recent crap...... More than a Quarter-Life-Crisis :-)
Wanted to try something different, failing miserably at it... Yielding to Craziness
I lost the login credentials of this one, one more outcome of Initial Madness...
Well, for all practical,political and social purposes, the most active and probably the most readable one of the lot That's the Nocturnal Me!

So many blogs and so little time to maintain them all, to be regularly updated...........proved to be a down-right toughest task... Than updating the MPP for my project....
And hence, I decide, on a gleeful note to at least have Mr.Nocturnal, Active ...Live & Kicking!

Pain!

Pain is when your emotions
Fail your words and you have no one for your rescue…

Pain is not doing something that you like
Cos of the fright that you may end-up not being liked
for what you do…

Pain is if you are mistook for what you did
And was never given a chance to undo it…

Pain is when you can’t get a real time-machine
To get back to your golden days and stay there forever…

Pain is when whatever good you try to do
Blows-up big on your face every time without
Failing to leave a never fading scar….

Pain is when you look around to find someone
There’s no one in the near vicinity to understand you…

But Pain really is, when you know that the world’s
Holding a lot more people who are suffering more than you in everyway
Yet, you can’t stop yourself from cribbing!

What's the OFFER like?

To get out of things that you were good at is much more difficult than trying to get good at something that’s completely new to you. A darkness more than a no-moon night settles over you during that bad, bad phase where in you got to embark on the fact that, “Hey dude, this is all you got for now, take it and be happy as long as it lasts!”

Well, that said, On a rationally different note, I would stomp my right foot forcefully and cry out loud à “Anything is possible if you really T.R.Y & most of us give-up almost at the verge of getting it, making it all the more easier for our successors, who don’t really have to sweat too hard as they already are treading the beaten but unfinished path.”

I am not the one that quits quite soon. Give-up is something that I hate to do even for the verbal effect of it. But now, giving up differs a lot depending on the circumstances that you are part of or pushed into knowingly or unknowingly, wantonly or not!

There have been a lot of social anomalies identified in the society and system we’re living in; hues & cries about the same from all corners of the country from individuals, group of people, public-serving-organizations or communities creating one hell of a ruckus on and off, in a way dying for a tainted means of acquiring an undying spot on the magazines or newspapers on the current affairs section or on the hot-listed weeklies, trying to sound politically right all the time! (Of course, no more than a zilch logically; but who cares dude?)

Well, what’s all this about anyways… one might ask…with the multitude of problems in the society, community and country wide, I am kind of stuck in deciding on which one to pick first…

Men sneering and jeering at women folks in public places?
Men not giving opportunities to women folks at work places?
Men not treating women folks on par with their mental abilities?

While, these three points would fill one’s plate of argument to the brim, it just doesn’t stop there; there are also repercussions of giving-what-was-asked-for echoing from all corners of the country.

Women folks mocking men at public places?
Women folks going all out on a stampede-mode with men at workplaces?
Women folks not treating the men working with them in the right sense?

Why is always ready to pounce and prey on each other?

I don’t think Adam & Eve would have liked that really, had they seen what was it to a civilized world giving two different genders, featuring specialized capabilities and characters to change the world into a more constructive place to flock to (even for other unknown alien forms of living beings from the other planets) rather than making it more destructive day by day.

I ain’t anyone to change this à la mode that’s laid deep into zillions of minds by now. What I could rather do is to prevent victimizing my future-gen from going through all of these…. But would it really happen?

It may or may not, I am no one to comment on that, but at least I would do my share of it, a very minuscule & molecular effort to clean up the vast ocean spread across the universe.

Did I really make any sense out here, while I was on this post?

I leave it to you reader and would safely assume you prevailing sanity after reading this post to be the proof of sense derived out of this one! :-)

Story: "Avalanche"

"Look Anirudh!!” she stomped her feet to a noisy halt and turned around to face Anirudh who was busy kicking a battered coke can and was also simultaneously busy looking at her.

“Oh well, that’s what I’ve been doing for long babe, err.. I mean yah! I’ve been seeing you for a while now….which is ummm… politically right I would think” He winked at her not giving an iota for the intensity and seriousness in her tone.

Before she could react, he threw in… “By the way Su, Why don’t you call me Ani!!! I hate being called Anirudh… it makes me wince dammit!”

Now she expressed a cold scowl and told that “I will not do that! And you better stop calling me SU, for it sounds like “LOO” every time you utter that!”…..giving a short pause she gestured with her index finger carving a curve to her lips and said “Read my lips now…..My name is Swarnanalatha Sreedharan..Call me just that…and nothing else”

Ani let out a deep sigh and said, “oh common Su, get a life!!! I agree that I am madly, deeply, crazily, head-over-heels about the way your full name sounds in a very whimsical way.. Very stylish as I always keep muttering even in my dreams…but that doesn’t mean I would for my lifetime keep referring with your full-hell-seductive-name! It takes 2 seconds 79 milliseconds and 123 nanoseconds to do that! Which I would choose to do only when I am turned on full swing romantically…. Otherwise I just hafto spend half a second in saying “Su”… Energy Saver babe!!

At this Swarna was totally taken to the brink of her saturation point during which she always tended to pull at the string that had a small tweety bird attached to it which dangled down the side of her bag that she wore across her chest.

He came from behind her over her shoulder and cleared his throat with his classy way of pushing-up his 3rd and 4th eyes that were desperately sliding down his nose bridge… “Ahem… May I be blessed to know what on earth my sweety’s-tweety did to you that you are tugging at her so badly that she might end-up having a traumatic brain damage especially since that string that you’re trying hard to pull-out is popping out of her head?”

With levitating bitterness of his presence around her constantly to remind her of the recently-developed fright of losing to him in an argument which she never has with anyone in her life till date, she took two steps ahead with a disgusted look on her face; as if to mean that his nostrils letting out the air he took in few moments back feeling warm on her open neck is some kind of curse or irreversible stigma that she wanted to save herself from.

Although, this revolted Ani, he understood that he was going way overboard with a pro-conservative girl like Swarna. He calmed himself down saying “Easy Man! One step at a time” inside his head and letting few seconds pass by with impending silence during this preparatory class that he took often from none other than his very own mind.


“Well okay-okay…. My deepest apologies for having your right foot’s right most little toe hurt by my stinging words!.... now please please pretty please… will you smile please?”

“I am now all ears to whatever you were gonna tell me…. When you said “Look Anirudhhhh!” “… he said in a dramatic fashion trying his refined masterpiece of gimmick at her and Woah… it did solve the purpose for she burst out laughing uncontrollably and started chasing him around with her kitty-bag extended out to hit him if she ever managed to stop him.

After having run for sometime both of them stopped underneath a tree gasping for breath and longing with thirst and need for water, yet laughing maniacally at the whole incident.

Mr.Hero then vanishes to get a water bottle from a near by tupri shop while our lady still is in the verge of tears due to excessive running around and laughing and etc included.

After the long needle had traced a quarter past the numbers that showed on Ani’s brand-new Rolex that his dad presented him recently for his birthday a fortnight back…. Swarna started getting on to the serious talk that she intended to have with Ani for a while now.
“Ani, I have been thinking to tell you about this for a long time but you never gave me a chance everytime I wanted to do the talking……”


“Ooops! Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! I didn’t do it! Man I haven’t even gotten to the extent of laying my little finger on to your about-to-fall little toe!... So its not me! I cannot take this accusing, Although I really dream of being accused so one pretty & bright Sunday morning!” … That would be a ticket to marrying you…. You see!”

“Oh there you go again!!!!! Anirudh will you ever stop throwing these stupid & reckless stunts of yours and let me speak when I am still sane????”

“Yes your highness, but only if you will allow my name to be referred as “Aniiiii” instead of that painfully flinching full-name allusion!”

“Alright! Listen then…..do you know that I come from a family where-in skipping to wear a Bindi is considered as a crime and talking to a Brahman on the off-days of the month is taken to be an irreversible sin and letting my hair loose after washing my hair or as a style to maintain is considered as a means of welcoming bad-luck into our home?”


Ani raised an eyebrow and looked at her sideways with an intriguing set of curved lines knotted to form a design that only a slushy mud road with fresh signs of a container lorry that had recently visited them uninvited could have caused.

After a long pause, he said “Interesting………Ummm… know what babe, I am a Brahmin too and I do understand that I haven’t been brought up this strict, well I feel this has got nothing to do my wishing to be yours for this lifetime… I sincerely feel so!”

At this, Su really got heated up and in a mad pace, she went in a half-trot-half-walk manner across the road towards the river bank that had an exotic view of its natural life elixir on one side with the diminished long shot beautiful miniature of the whole city on the other. She chose to do this on occasions when anger went conquering her faculty of senses uncontrollably and hence this was an act of yearning peace at times of such mental crises.
Understandably our hero follows Su and stood beside her and spoke in her ears so softly that only she could have heard.

“What makes it so difficult for you to believe me? Do I look like a prankster to you? Do you think I am not being serious about things that I mention about us? What do I have to do to prove myself that I being dead-bolt serious about every word I utter about you?..... if you think this is what I am gonna ask you…… you are mistaken dude! That’s not Ani is all about. I believe in something that my freaked out mind urges me into, it may look impulsive but hey look, I don't care about all that.... what my inner instructor says is the white rabbit’s way for this Neo! I am not being dramatic here. Simple and Plain truth dame!”

Having said that he leaned across her who was keen on taking in the river’s serenity more than Ani’s words, bending backwards to face her better and said….
“ I wanna marry you! I have made up my mind. I don’t wanna force you, But I dont wanna listen to your silly justifications to be against this...”

Shocked at this statement, Su slowly turned her head and gaped at Ani unable to believe her ears at what they renosated inside her head with his last few sentences...... But somehow she knew something on the similar lines were going to be delivered.. well, not this deliberate though!

Alright, It's time for me to talk right now, She thought.....

“I’ve told this before and you are making me say it again. Anyways, if that’s what you want, that’s what you get! Now, that you got me started…So, here you go… sometime back when I said “Don’t make me fall in love Ani” , I didn’t mean that I am stopping myself with all my strengths from falling for you, rather I meant that it isn’t going to prove anything right, useful or wrong over here, but it just means … yet another sentimental ride, an emotional trip, a complete ramshackle of your mental resources when you would consider the entire fiasco as an afterthought at a later date. The reasons are manyfold, quite a few of them just for you ...all over again....
Factor 1: I am elder to you by age.
Factor 2: The way you think and I do are totally different.
Factor 3: The way you grew up and I did can never match.
Factor 4: Many of your likes are forever-toppers in my loathsome list.
Factor 5: What you call as “Fun” is “Shockingly & Surprisingly Maddening” to me.

With all of these and many more, I am unable draw a line as to where do I really stand or even snuggle hard to fit into your frame of expectations that would remain invisible yet strong sitting on my head as “a beautiful crown of responsibilities” to be borne (not worn...cos if it's worn I can probably... just maybe throw it away saying I just dont like it sitting atop my head!) by traditionally rich and marginally contemporary ladies of the Indian Manufacturing & Packaging! (Mind you! without any foreign collaboration anywhere at that by any means what-so-ever!)

Now, Having said that,I don’t know what’s in store for me in the future. It could be the worst that anyone can have or the best that anyone could get. But I am game for both or either. Absolutely no regrets at that one. But …if…. Let’s just say……..what if….. You fail to acknowledge certain things coming from me and even fail to realize that you faltered? I am not perfection personified.. and so are many humans till date… but this could happen to anyone like you and me…. So why take chances? Let’s rather remain glued, unfaltering in our very own paths and resign to what Mr.Fate’s got in his lot written for us. I feel this one sounds much better…much more realistic…definitely less complex… certainly much impressive and also much to say more S.E.N.S.I.B.L.E”

She took a long & deep breath.

For one, she ran out of breath having spoken the above without even the minimal pauses that’s required, as is the way of her speaking, for which again Ani loved her for, and the other out of a small relief in speaking out all she wanted to with him for quite some time now….

Without wanting to make note of his reaction to this long monologue of hers, She continued....

“So Anirudh, at this juncture (they really were at a junction of cross roads), I don’t want be dragged along to the right(turn) for I can clearly see that isn’t taking the road to my HOME, as the one that I am part of right now and the one that I would want to be as well. I would rather appreciate sticking to the left(turn) and tracing my way back to my very HOME the way I want it, just alone for now until I find one of my choice who not-even a wee-bit as insane or moronic as I am....Great men said Opposites Attract!... Right?”

She turned around adjusting her sling-bag that was laid across her chest without any motion or activity for a long time now and tried to take the left turn, but thought better to stop for one final moment, and spun-around to see Ani and wave him a final good-bye and spill that infectious little smile for the last time that had hit him hard exactly an year back when they met each other at the same
cross-roads, which then he thought (maybe still does) was a divine-intervention!

An avalanche of emotion was rushing into every vein of Anirudh’s body leaving him stock-still and anchored to the spot in the middle of the cross-roads, with the on-going traffickers honking and throwing profanities at him for obstructing their way.

Make what you will of that - Dear Reader!

******Story Ends On A Not So Impressive Note Here*******

P.P.S:Reasons withheld for Weird & Inexplicable Raison d'être

P.S: Copy Rights Reserved - Original Unabridged First Version - Feb 2008

What is a friendship worth?

Is it worth listening to the rumblings
of jealousy born from resentment
of the closeness shared?

Is it worth turning a blind
eye to the glee of that
surround us at the first sign
of dispute and disagreement?

Is it worth ignoring
the speed with which others,
in their frenzied need to denigrate,
hurry to add to our uncertainties?

Is it worth that
benefit of doubt that we
can extend to our enemy
but not to our closest friends?

Is it worth allow the insecurities
that dwell inside to emerge
and tear at the fabric of
love that has been woven in your heart?

Is it worth leaving the memories
of shared dreams and moments behind
on a field of angry words,
thoughts and actions?

Is it worth an unforgiving
heart that refuses to hear
another’s cries and will not
allow for human fragilities?

Is it worth the stubborn
pride that keeps us from
admitting we might have been
wrong or might not have understood?

Is it worth hardening
your sweet soul to the
pleas for understanding
from someone who once
shared your thoughts and emotions
on a daily basis?

Is it worth giving up
that part of you that you
once gave freely and with
love to another?

Is it worth forgetting
all the good in favor
of the bad?

Is it worth
the tears of God as He
mourns the anger inside
our hearts?

If friendship is worth so little,
then was it truly friendship?

Hmmmm.... True, Very true indeed. That got me thinking to all those silly squabbles I have been having endlessly with my best of buddies, hurting them badly!

My sincere apologies to all my Acquaintances, Friends, Not-So-Good Friends, Not-So-Bad-Friends, Good Friends, Closest & Best Friends.... for hurting you all at some point in life due to my mad temperament!

This could happen to YOU!

It’s true that I didn’t realize that it could happen to me until it actually did, not once, not twice but three times in a row!
Well, what more can I say of a relationship which was pure and flawless until very recently one off the two is completely going down the drains for no mistake of the other.

Roses are Red
Violets are Blue
Even if you rue
I would still glue!

We had this common policy amidst us that we would be there
to back the other person-up whenever he/she feels down, make sure that they aren’t loosing out on anything that they should actually deserve just because they are being so remorseful. At the end of the day, all were happy!

No one lost a thing…that was cos the presence of the other as a solid support never made the one in distress to loose anything due of their temporary mood swings.

That’s how good friends we were..

Until one day uncalled came a storm of so called commitment in a relationship which shattered miserably all our castles built out of thin air, and then demolished all hopes of our future which withheld the underlying long-term or lifelong friendship that was promised from both ends.

**************************
From one of my parchments……… dedicated to a recently lost friend of mine giving it a hattrick effect to the demise of 3 wickets in a row!

Highly (Dis)connected!

More often that not, you wish you had a better neighbor than what you’ve got, every time you travel in the local bus or train.
Well, one of my recent train journeys turned out to be a complete disaster.
I was traveling from station X to station Y for a friend’s over the weekend and that’s like an hour and a half of travel time in the local train. Hmm, it took quite some time though to settle in and expect a marginally decent co-passenger who could contribute, much less, to be a decent human being if not a perfect company! But no, my dear Mr. Fate decides that I ought to have a tough time before I get my ticket to the “48-hours-of-absolute-happiness” at my best friend’s place.

So I get into the silver train all excited looking forward to experience one of the most cherished times over the weekend. I walked through the cars to find one with much lesser people so that I can take a seat all for myself, sink-in deep into it and be lost in my own world of thoughts. And lucky me, I got what I wanted at the end of the 3rd car, so with a low whistle and a happy trot I almost jumped into my seat, threw by backpack next to me and rested my feet on the opposite seat enjoying every second of the cushion-treatment that my cold feet were taking-in. It was pretty cold outside with the snow-fall getting severe from the time it had started this afternoon.

Oh boy! This is gonna be terrible cold…I almost thought aloud and then immediately switched off the worry-mode & decided to get into my world of happiness, world where I saw plush green gardens with children swinging and playing sesame’s and hide & seek’s and merry-go-round’s. I love imagining those happy looking faces of kids ranging from age 1-10. It’s a lovely sight to look at those innocent, sweet, plain and simple, clean n clear like crystal, honest and unbelievably cute looking faces that I have come across in my life at every other place that I’ve been to during my stay & travel till date. I love babies, I love especially girl babies, they constantly remind me of worldly embodiment of GOD rather GODDESS that is quintessential to extend happiness around, I must say!

You just keep looking at them, being blissful and nonchalant, merry and spreading the aura of positive energy all over the place. No doubt, it’s a beautiful creation of the almighty sitting up there and doing all this magic with a flick of his fingers or maybe a brush with which he paints such adorable creations on planet earth.

Just when I was thinking about the god’s boon of babies to the world of mothers, I was instantly interrupted by my bane with a loud thud next to me, letting me take a couple of extra seconds to reel from the shock of what had led, to lose the connection with my world of goddesses.
So, with that sudden detachment, I open my eyes to see a heavy set woman, an Indian, who had dumped her hand baggage right on top of my bag. Whoa!!! That bag of hers was so damn huge, must be some 75pounds or so and I gingerly watched the scene of my lay’s chips getting crushed to pieces and the super-soft yummy coconut pastry that I had prepared specially for my friend getting flattened as a steam ironed cotton shirt!

I am a show woman, (if at all there exists a word of that sort and whatever that was supposed to mean), oh yeah, that is what I am and wherever I went the spotlight just follows me like mad! Uh.. I am so sick of this fame and fan following… if you know what I mean…Ha Ha Ha Ha!

She bellowed with her whole body bobbing in an up & down motion in synchronization with the huge quaver in the name of laughter that she just let out. Now, That’s just not the end of it, to add more to my irritation this lady was even ejecting gas spasmodically from her stomach through the mouth intermittently which was beating out-n-out all those disgusting belch’s anyone would let out, with out even excusing themselves or caring even the least bit about it in a public place, And THAT completely turned me off!

Upon 3 more minutes of incongruent mad ranting of hers I figured that she’s a theatre actress in one of the renowned local theatres of the city and that she has got one of the biggest fan clubs in the foreign countries as against all her rivals/counterparts of the same community.

On a commemorative note, her fan club members residing across the country have decided to sculpt her figure (I bet; a scary one at that) into a decorative sandstone statue with a tint of beige and pink combination to add more gloss and a “Signature” finish to the lucrative idea of her so-called fans! And this was decided to be to be kept on display in the Arts and Science Museum of the City (I wanted to blast out “FOR WHAT???!!!..YOU ARE SUCH A MISFIT TO BE AN ART AND A DEFINITE FLAW IN SCIENCE”). Paying least attention to the grave, highly disinterested expression on my face, she went on “Natural sandstone finish adds more to the appeal of the artifacts, that too with that pinkish-beige combination which is definitely the most prominent and unique feature to make my idol stand-out!”

BOASTING, BOASTING and BOASTING – The very thing which brings in that usual upchuck feeling in my stomach was brought about with wave of disgust filling through my mind like stream of water flowing down those sand gulley’s formed during rainy days
She didn’t seem to get even an ounce of what was happening to me, or my lack of interest or my contorted facial expression due to her unstoppable jabbering for nearly a quarter to an hour now!

I was lost in thought of how shallow could a person be, when I was taken aback by a strange noise of water being splashed and strained through a small nozzle of a huge container and then settled a bit when I realized that she was producing that strange sound from her mouth which was now filled with water.

She wasn’t gargling the water, nor was she trying to gulp it down, but it was something intermediate that she was doing which caused that most irritable noise that got me back to the reality with this monster of a lady sitting next to me.

With the time ticking away, her nuisance was blowing-out-of-proportion and that got me on my nerves.

I slowly turned my head to face her side profile strained against the window pane with those uncanny noises she was still managing to produce through her mouth and nostrils post-gulping the water. I guess she would have caught my eye in the reflection that danced on the glass pane, so she suddenly stopped that noise and cleared her throat with a loud ear blaring“ahennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn-gaheeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn” of a sound and looked at me with a wide smile…. “This”……..she pointed to her mouth and continued uninterrupted paying no heed to my disapproving head-shake “is what my fitness expert has advised me to do as many times as I can in a day to keep my cheeks from tottering & cause the skin around it to sag prematurely. It’s a thrilling exercise, you know, it’s too much fun more so with those interesting sounds…. HA HA HA HA HA!”

I, who was holding-up for long with my pent-up anger with this monster of a lady, realizing it’s really not worth it anymore….said
“Zip-up that motor-mouth of yours will you? Just SHUT-UP… Not a single word more…..What on earth do I care about who you are and what you do? And why should I be enduring your cantankerous sneaking into my private world of thoughts since the time you settled your big-fat-bottom comfortably next to me? Can’t you understand that the whole world is glaring at you with complete abomination for all those god-forbidden nonsensical & ridiculous noises you have been composing? No-one’s enjoying it Lady; to hell with your fan-club…..who are they? …..show them to me! Right now.. I’ll tell them how sick you can get while travelling in public…. A senseless, manner-less, irrational, unfounded female does not for her life-time deserve a sand-stone statue of hers to be spoiling the sanctity of the museum, for who knows even that would let out such inexorable “Signature” noises of yours!... Now don’t you ever dare to travel next time in a train like this!!!”

Having said that in a mad fit of anger, I took my bag and walked off the car noisily to get down for my station had arrived in all this commotion with my friend waving at me gleefully from outside.

I got down all smiles from the train, trying to ward-off the sick experience that probably would have made me shrink even if it was a nightmare; which it was not!

Thought: Building Castles in Thin Air!

This morning when I happened to check my yahoo account for new emails after about a week’s break, this one with a subject “A NOTE FROM Dr. XYZ – PLS READ CAREFULLY” caught my attention. Although I heard six warning bells inside my head blaring-out, all at once; vociferous enough to deafen my ears, each of them coming from each one of the six senses that I supposedly possess, all I had to do was to temporarily tap it to a silent mode to get on to a fast-forward mode. With the six folks now glaring at me sordidly huddled in one dusty corner….I went about clicking on the subject line to get to the details of this most creepiest of mails sitting innocently in my inbox posted as on Nov 10th 2007.
With the crazy globe on the top right corner of my browser revolving at the speed of a tortoise’s gait and the message on the status bar below showing as:

Opening page ShowLetterId? MsgID=45676545X&hgklsrydddggg……..

I waited for 30 raring-to-go seconds tapping my fingers restlessly on the key board tray….
And then suddenly, just when I stopped tapping, the status bar lit up with a set of green colored square boxes progressing slowly to demonstrate a flourish of activity happening at the background leaving me at the edge of my seat… all the more inquisitive and a bit jittery about what could really be awaiting inside that most curious looking email (or so I thought it looked).

Quarter past another minute, cursing the ISP under my breath, there lands the response page I was looking for…..with a throbbing heart and trembling fingers, constricted eyes strained to its maximum elasticity to read the smallest size of the font that was used to draft the below mail; I was reading out loud……..

Dear Friend,Though this approach appears desperate,difficulties encountered in efforts to establish abusiness abroad necessitate this search forsomeone to assist me in securing and investingthe sum of USD18,000,000 (eighteen million dollars)deposited in my name abroad.By way of summarized profile of myself, I amDr. XYZ a 64years old lady and thewife of Mr. ABC (former head ofstate and President of East Timor).
From past experiences, many people I had regarded as close friendsand relatives has capitalize on my family'stravail to run away with my money. In order to avert thisnegative development, I in conjunction with myson now seek your permission to allow us do aCHANGE OF OWNERSHIP/REASSIGNMENT OFCREDIT of stated funds from the deposit company toyour name, so that the funds (US$18million)would be released to you as the BENEFICIARY (onbehalf of me and my family).Our family trusteehave secretly protected the deposit, you are toassist us to lay claims of the funds with the aidof all legal documents that will be forwarded toyou as time goes on. If you agree to help,we shall discuss the disbursement ratio in ournext correspondence after we have beenacquainted.
I have decided to offer 20% of the above sumto anyone who assists us to secure this fundsoverseas or 20% share for possible help oninvesting in any reliable venture.No doubt this proposal will make youapprehensive, please I employ you to observeutmost confidentiality and rest assured that thistransaction would be most profitable for both ofus.PLEASE INDICATE YOUR INTEREST BY RESPONDING TOMY ALTERNATIVE EMAILADDRESS
Email:xtzabc6465@yahoo.com
WITH THE FOLLOWING INFO:Your full name and addressYour telephone/fax numbers.Once I receive this information, my son willprepare the necessary documents that will putyou in place as the new owner of the funds. Themoney will then be released to your custody bythe Deposit Company.Awaiting your swift response.Sincerely yours,Dr. Mrs XYZ.Email: xtzabc6465@yahoo.com.
Awwwwwhhhh!!! 20% of $18 Million is how much?????
Quickly & swiftly my hands reach up to the windows à run à calc + Enter, & I type in the figures to see the magical numbers of my astounding future, It stood gleefully at $3,600,000 (Three Million Six Hundred Thousand Dollars)!!!

Approximately about 14,40,00,000 – Indian Rupeees!!!! :-O:-O:-O

Fourteen odd CRORES?!?!?! ………

OH MY GOD!
OH MY GOD!!
OHHHH MYYY GODDD!!!!

My pinched myself hard to see if this wasn’t a dream!!! Or if I was at the threshold of some treasure hunt game or in any case at a place where I should be After-Death!
Nope. None of the above.

Very much alive and kicking and sitting in front of my age old computer and off-putting internet connection that blinks forever to scare the hell out of me as if to mean “I-might-die-anytime-now”!.

Hmmmm…such an unbelievable twist-in-the-story for a below average, less than mundane, morbid low level life on a bright Wednesday morning…

I wasn’t sure which one of the following emotions were racing past the other to hit the red band first,

Contended?
Dumbfound?
Flabbergasted?
Shocked?
Surprised?
Stunned?
Spellbound?
Speechless?
Taken Aback?
Traumatized?

You bet, I was hit by all of them almost at once and it was quite a feeling, pretty much unexplainable for me in those desperate milliseconds of fighting for words…..

I was 2 feet above the ground looking for my mom to tell her that she needs to start seeing a multi-millionaire Groom for me and not a 7,8,9 or10 LPA earning silly, boring and lifeless software pro!

Ah! These are just froth bubbles out of the soap water aren’t they…?

“Hey GOD!!! Are you listening to me at all???? Why can’t someone knock some sense into this silly girl’s dumb-head????”

I heard my heart screaming on top of its voice at the almighty, just when I was about to tap my mom’s shoulder to tell her about this eventful email this morning!

Thoughtfully.............................Me!

Thought: Importance of Meetings!

As we all wait for the meeting to begin, the precarious moments of the next hour looms large in front of us, with sweaty palms, shaking legs, tapping ID cards, drumming fingers, paper cones cleaning the ears, chewing of the gums, dancing pens, scribbling on the paper, rolling the paper weight or even doing some eye-exercise to release the stress or fight-out your sleep; are some of the most noticeable actions that we see in the meeting room. These meetings never seem to get anywhere is also an opinion that’s widely heard across many organizations.

Moreover, half the people attending the meeting seem distracted and the other half frustrated. The distracted lot keep checking their watches once in every 10 seconds while the frustrated ones keep thinking about their receding hair lines.

And then we hear our host begin, clearing his throat in the most clichéd rhythm,
Now, we’ve been meeting every week for months and the purpose seems to have gotten lost as I see no progress on the milestones that we must have met long since!

And then suddenly you ask yourself, "Darn, How did we get here and what can be done about it? And most of all, who invented these meetings anyway? Of all the days, why should it be on this very day when I must leave by 3pm to pick up my kid from the school as she returns from her excursion after a long week?"

Your feeling of dread deepens as you momentarily recall that . . . you're supposed to be the driving this meeting and you are the one who must take the MOM (Minutes of the Meeting) and also run this meeting during your host’s absence.

Well, now block all thoughts that belong to the outside world of those glass doors and confine your thought processes to the crux of the very discussion that you are getting into.

• First things first, Being on time for the meetings is like learning “A for Apple” so don’t do any mistakes on that one!

• Try to be a leader and take charge of the situation no matter wherever or however important you are in the meeting.

• Identify exactly what you want to expect in each of these meetings and do keep a check if these are accomplished and is catering to the needs of the participants.

• You have been invited for a meeting, simply means that your presence is deemed to serve some purpose.

• A meeting is where the most critical and significant information is shared across teams and key decisions are made on mutual consensus and unanimous approvals.

• Make it known to everyone in the forum that each person is expected to contribute.

• Set a clear tone as to who’s responsible for what and by when. If not met make the defaulter run the meetings next time onwards until they see that the expectations are met 100%.(just an idea, can be anything instead that’s bound to the practical feasibility of the system, audience and organization)

• Remind yourself that it's your responsibility to make sure everyone is engaged and energized by the discussions and by the purpose of the meeting.

• Meetings that are regular, focused, appropriate and timely are always welcome for the success of a team and organization on the whole.

• Paying attention to the meeting is probably one of most vital things that many should work on as there could be potentially a lot of take-away’s that we may tend to miss out on!

• Creating an experience that makes each participant to think of your meetings as necessary and valuable could probably be one of the best gifts one can ask for!

To be a true leader, Appreciations at the right time, indication of the issues & identification of risks upfront including corrective measures or suggestions for the same at the right time and right place, to top it all with regular motivational pep talks, nurturing the ownership mentality with in the team and plunging-in to resolve issues by rolling-up your sleeves when the times call for it are all the prerequisites!

When someone is all of the above, automatically the Leader in him rises to a pinnacle and then there are no mistakes after that!

When ten people gather under one roof to discuss ideas, that’s where a lot of Newton’s are reborn, to make it sound more relevant in a Software jargon, let’s get together regularly and without fail to bring out the hidden “Bill Gates” in us!

At the same time, Let’s also throw-in our feedback if a meeting is not effective, Be the first to start it!

For someone wisely said, “Treading the beaten path is no fun, when I can lay my own new road!”

So, Junta please attend your meetings!!!! J

Signing off,
On a Meeting Note

The Gutter Me!

I am known to speak pretty openly about things, mind you, when I say openly there’s a lot of difference between the one that speaks explicit stuff about sex/sex related topics in the name of being open!

I am not speaking about that here…. This one goes with my inclination towards subtle-profanity in using copious swear words for the sacrilege intended in general. (Well, well only with closest of my buddies of course!).

As a result of which some of my friends do warn me about: me being way too self-indulgent to an extent of being called as a spoilt-brat, which is not what I am (ha! At least most of the times, Yes my lord, I swear – No lies there!)

So, with the gutter me’s ego being hurt enough to give a purple eye, I went about for a bit of retrospection seeking for a probable reason for justifying the invisible crown that clinched firmly on my head.

And as they show in the age old Eastman color movies, I didn’t see a coil or helix revolving around in front of my eyes, but it was a hazy dark backdrop (with nothing clearly visible enough to make an identity) walking me back to my childhood days…..

***********************
Dad had come down for lunch that day for somehow Tamil Nadu government never declared “Sri Rama Navami” as a holiday. But my school was off, I don’t seem to remember how/why though… but not my brothers (Yippeee.. I was enjoying at home eating lot of goodies that my mom prepared while my brother had to be at his school!).
Panakam, Neer Mor & Poli etc al – Food solutions guaranteed by mom as always is the case with her; be it a festivity or not!

(Panakam =Sweetened water using sugar candy+Ginger, Neer Mor = buttermilk, Poli – Kind of sweet that looks like roti stuffed with sweet.)

Pooja as usual went in a really grand manner, thanks to the splendid efforts of my mom to keep things going cool, easy and traditionally and culturally and also customarily rich and flawless. As with the routine we finished our lunch together with my brother joining us during his lunch break.

Brother leaves in a hurry after a heavy lunch and so must dad now. Dad was all set to go and gave life to his scooter when the roaring 2-stroke engine’s sound rang a bell in my head and I rushed all the way from the back-yard, where I was having a mango and stopped at the front gate of our house just in time to save myself from banging hard against the iron bars and also make it to see off my dad with a happy wave from my free left hand.

After finishing all the juice out of the mango, not really interested with the leftovers I tried a full-toss at the nearest garbage bin of our street, and it went up, up and up in the air though but never landed on the earth…. Amazed, I was at the mango chunk that had disappeared in thin air; I walked past the iron gate and peeped out of my front veranda that had an open ditch of about 5X4X3 Feet lying adjacent to the edge of the floor where the front veranda ends. That ditch having gutter water accumulated in it is left open on the street. Without a second thought about reaching the edge of the veranda I was still super keen on the missing mango-chunk that I threw higher up in the air and was still gaping at the sky with my mouth wide-open and missed a step to find myself frantically struggling for breath, drowning and making attempts to shout out loud. I don’t know from where God sent my savior, my mom, who gave her hand and pulled me out of the gutter. I was drenched black matching the color of the pool that I just emerged from. For a few seconds, I was totally disoriented and it took me minutes figure out what had just happened. Those few seconds of interaction, mingling, immersing and fighting out for life with all those cockroaches, other visible and invisible beings of that gutter trap could possibly have left some after effects in me when I think about that very fateful day, 17 years ago which had me gulp-in the most unwanted with the incident (or should I say accident?) still itched on to my memory deep, strong and embossed like a thick scar.

***********************
Could this be the reason for my inclination towards profanities?
Oh no, that’s a hypocrite in me talking again!
Hell, I wasn’t like this till I finished my college, for heaven’s sake I still remember the way I used to shudder on hearing the four lettered word being uttered by someone. Mind you, I had been into books even then, so they are not the reason!
Bah, No!!! It’s not about being so radical or even remotely closer to those lines.
Being hip, posh or fad has never been something that I could take in like my daily coffees.
No boss, that’s something that, suits this dainty old personality of mine!
So it isn’t an avant-garde thingy as well!!!
Gosh!! Someone please help me understand this freaking disease that I am struck with in the last two years leaving me no better than an ill-tempered, irritable & grumpy old piece of shit that I am………Ah! There I go!!!!!!!!!!!!!

***********************

A Story on "Motivation"

There was once a rich landlord who desired to feed his entire village on a special occasion. He decided to hire the best cook in the district and sent for him.

'There should be no question of any compromise. Only the best for the best occasion.' Such was the landlord's desire and wish. Sensing the rich man's need and desire, the cook asked for a fancy price, to which the zamindar agreed without haggling. Happy at the thought of getting what he had asked for, the cook set about his task earnestly. On the D-day, the cook and his team arrived with full enthusiasm.

The very thought of the high monetary return motivated the cook to such an extent that he in turn inspired his subordinates to give out the very best for the day. Together, the team produced a sumptuous spread that satisfied the palate, the hearts of the villagers and the landlord who had hired the cook. Every dish was perfectly done and presented. They served the guests with great love and care. The food was so good that there occurred a shortfall. The landlord therefore asked the cook to prepare more of the same items. At this, the cook was slightly upset; nevertheless, he executed his job without complaining.

As it happened, there was a difference in the quality of the food produced the second time. It was not as good this time. Because by now the enthusiasm of the cook had dropped and it had rubbed off on his workers. Somehow, the cook began to get the feeling that he was giving more than he had bargained for. Nobody seemed to have noticed and very soon, as it happened the first time, there was a shortfall again and the zamindar felt there were still some important members that had been left out. He therefore requested the cook to repeat the magic of producing the same quality of food a third time. This time, the cook was positively not enthusiastic. Surely, the zamindar was asking for much more than he had bargained. The cook did not open his mouth, but there was no denying the fact that the quality was nothing compared to the previous exercises.

The evening drew to a close and the cook and his team began the task of clearing their things. The money was handed over to the cook and he accepted it without too much enthusiasm. As the cook was preparing to leave, the zamindar asked him to wait. He then ordered his servants to bring the packets that he had kept aside for the cook.

The cook was initially surprised. He was totally taken aback when he realised that the packets the zamindar had asked for were indeed the last lot of food cooked by him, now packed for him in neat containers. The zamindar had been so pleased with his cooking that he didn't want the cook's family to miss the fare. The important members that the zamindar had referred to had been the cook's family members. At this, the cook blanched. If only he had known…

Does it not tell us how important it is in life to keep our motivation level at its best, whatever the circumstance?

- Source Unknown

Thought:Think Different!

It is what we often fail to notice everytime we falter in something that we took up to succeed and come out with flying-colors. It is the deceit of the inherent belief in the task taken up by us, that's pre-defined and pre-designed and even pre-expected only to succeed, but no failures!

That definitely is now on the contrary to what we have been fed-enough to go by the ancient adage"Give your best and Be prepared for the worst to come!"

Having said that, its quite a common belief to tread a beaten path which is perhaps safe.But, sometimes it could be uninspiring too. Always tracing a known path will get you results that are already experienced and expected. The outcome of walking through an used corridor is never going to be phenomenal. For those of us who want to be different, be noticed and who want to achieve success in life, the secret lies in daring to be different.

Deep down, all of us want to be known for something exceptional, something unique and something that identifies us on a podium amidst the mundane crowd. This is an inherent human attitude by nature. We see it manifested in our attitude towards our style of living, among other things. It is an attitude that should be harnessed and utilized in the right direction to ensure that it is reflected in our personal and professional growth rather in procuring material acquisitions. The first step in this direction lies in thinking differently. All of us go out everyday and see various things. Some people manage to find deep inspiration in ordinary things that they see. On many occasions, the outcome of this inspiration has proved invaluable to mankind.

For instance consider this example, that’s awe-inspiring to read, but which has immeasurable amounts of pains and failures attached to it to make it a reality as what we see it today:
The employees of the US Census Bureau were going about their work of taking the census count. One particular employee, Herman Hollerith, when travelling by train, noticed a train conductor punching tickets. He perceived that simple everyday occurrence, witnessed by thousands of people daily, differently and it started him on a chain of thoughts. The result of the practical application of his thoughts was an invention that would help in his work of tabulating census reports. This invention was the tabulating machine designed by him in the year 1890. Once his invention proved useful and popular he started a firm to market it. Initially known as the Tabulating Machine Company, it went on to become the renowned IBM - International Business Machines Corporation! (Source: tobeyourbest/Abridged version/IBM Archives)

This ability to perceive things differently can be developed over a period of time. However, it is essential not to attach too much of importance towards having a positive and beneficial outcome. Each and every outcome need not be sensationally outstanding. One should be prepared to deal with disappointments and take them in their stride. Dwelling on attempts that have borne not so successful results would only create a feeling of depression and sadness. So one should be able to rise above it and make a renewed attempt from an entirely different angle.

The secret goes in here! Many times, disappointments have led people to make revisions or improvisations that have eventually led to phenomenal success. Well, even if we did not get phenomenal results, let's look for newer avenues in the failed venture and if there isn't any that is apparent, do not hesitate to look for something else to do. Do not let one failed project or attempt ruin your spirits for a lifetime!

After all that’s not what life’s all about!!

Always remember the adage "Great people do not do different things, they simply do things differently". A different perception is bound to result in a creative solution. A good way to increase this particular skill would be do the usual things that you do in a slightly different manner from time to time. For all you know you might discover a more efficient way of doing the same thing!!

That’s a point to ponder for all of us!

Thought: Effective Leadership

In today’s world of competition, effective leadership is playing a major role. It not only enables each individual to prove his leadership skills, but also shows the individual ability in effectively dealing other team members. The present short article discusses about how effectively one can lead the teams in an efficient manner.

"Being the leader doesn't make you one, because leaders don't automatically get the respect and acceptance of their group members; so in order to earn the leadership of their group and have a positive influence on the group members, leaders learn some specific skills and methods." -- Thomas Gordon

Effective leadership does not mean that how effectively the leader is leading the team. But it does mean that how effectively the leader is working with the team and how effectively the leader is managing the team. In order to be an effective leader, one should be able to motivate the team in an efficient manner. As all of you are already aware, success of any project depends on effective leadership, effective leader does mean that, in the absence of leader, team should be able to work. Leader should not become critical to the team, but he should become critical in making the team to achieve team goals or meeting the deadlines. Team should not get prejudiced with the assignments that the leader does. Leader should assign the work to each and every individual by keeping the following things in mind.

1. Strengths of each team member
2. Weaknesses of each team member

Leader should provide a facility in such a way that juniors will learn from seniors within the team. He needs to motivate the team in all the aspects even during crisis period of a project. He should be able to effectively delegate the work to his members and at the same time he should make sure to meet the deadlines. Leader should be able to communicate to his team members in a language that is understandable to both of them.
Effective leader should be able to identify the strengths of each and every individual effectively within the team and should assist the concerned individual to grow. The feedback that the leader is going to give to a team member should help him work in a better way than earlier. During feedback, leader should not compare the team member with any other member in the team. He should mention clearly to the team member stating what was expected out of him and what was not met by him and what were the reasons resulting in those unmet expectations. Leader should also make sure that he has set all the objectives for each and every individual team member well in advance at the beginning of the project. This enables the team member to work in a better and a much more challenging environment. Leader should also need to take care of knowledge sharing among the team members/across the teams. This not only enables each and every individual to expose their skills and also puts the overall talent and maturity of the organization in a commendable manner. Effective leader does not need to necessarily have soaring technical capabilities. But having the technical skills not only enables the fast career growth for him and his team but also helps him resolve any technical issues with-in and across the account in an effective and efficient manner, there by making his presence known and well-acknowledged with in the organization and among the clients that he is working with. Effective leader should be able to forecast any problems that may likely to come in near future and should be ready with action plans to resolve them. Leader should be efficiently able to track any issues in the team and also should make sure to close those issues by prioritizing them. And finally he should try to establish himself as one of the family member within the team. This helps all his members to exchange their ideas/problems without any hesitation with him.

All these qualities specified above exclusively leverages the capabilities of a Leader and also allows him to quantify the “measure of success criteria” in his projects and amidst his team members.

To sum it up, wise men define the following as the most renowned and much sought-after characteristics of a winning leader who’s more effective and very efficient by all means: (Source: Agdex 1912-1. Revised August 1998.)

Effective Leaders will always be honest with their team members. This gives them credibility, resulting in the trust and confidence of their people. Credible leaders foster greater pride in the organization, a stronger spirit of cooperation and teamwork, and more feelings of ownership and personal responsibility.

• They do what they say they will do. They keep their promises and follow through on their commitments.
• They make sure their actions are consistent with the wishes of the people they lead. They have a clear idea of what others value and what they can do.
• They believe in the inherent self worth of others.
• They admit to their mistakes. They realize that attempting to hide a mistake is damaging and erodes credibility.
• They create a trusting and open climate.
• They help others to be successful and to feel empowered.
• They don't push too much. They encourage members to do more, but know when it's too much.
• They roll up their sleeves. They show the members they aren't just the figurehead or decision maker. Members respect leaders more when they show the willingness to work alongside them.
• They avoid phrases that cause resentment, reluctance and resistance. For instance, instead of saying you have to do something, effective leaders request or recommend that members do something.

All though all the above might not be feasible to put in action due to organizational, regional, cultural and environmental constraints that are generally overlooked at a global level, we all can at least give it a try, A genuine attempt should never really hurt!

Meeting a Stranger!

More often than not, certain rudimentary or fundamental things become so inexplicable yet so adoring that you are not really complaining that it has happened, but you are actually enjoying and are actually craving for more of it, at times.

So was this pleasant-sweet acquaintance of mine in an interesting training session that I attended very recently. Names are withheld for all known and unknown reasons.

For the first two days I didn’t know it was this guy that I was talking to for nearly 8 months or so officially. I have heard a lot about this dude and have wanted to see him sometime or the other, a plain curiosity at that, like how managers say “Just wanted to give a face to the name that has been much praised”.

Well, so we spoke on the first coffee break of day 1 during this training and he tells me that he knows me and asked about which project I am into right now and so on.
I was a bit pissed-off at that because, for once I wanted to disassociate myself from the project/domain/account that I belonged to, which has been tagging along with me like a 24X7 shadow or the “Hutch” doggy that keeps following you wherever you go for nearly 3 years now! I don’t have a choice now do I? So, I update him with whatever that I am up to presently and even then the foolish girl in me doesn’t seem to realize that it was the very same guy that I knew of or wanted to meet.

There was an air of significant arrogance and “I-kind-of-know-it-all” around this guy that made me think about the faint similarities that he had with one of my closes friends.
Well, temporarily I discharged the thought and went back to the training after the break.

The next day, I had to deliberately attend to my unsettling fetish for “Harry Potter & The Deathly Hallows” to take it along to the training classes with the hope of finishing it off (for the third time!) as I was in the trailing end of the book’s completion.

It was lunch time and I was rushing past the pages of HP7, sunk neck deep into it totally unawares of the surroundings, when I was startled by a voice that said “So, you are a fan of Harry Potter??” For once, I thought I was hallucinating as I didn’t see anyone right ahead of me or next to me, but then instantly I realized that the voice came from behind me and then I craned my neck to turn around and see the owner to whom it belonged to.

Bingo! It’s the same dude. I was like arrghh! I don’t want to start a conversation now, that too not on HP7 where-in I have to talk for it while the other speaks against it. With the gush of these thoughts clambering over each other inside my head, I utter a muffled “Yes”, hoping hard that a monosyllable response would end the conversation at once.

But I was wrong. He said “So this is that last book in the series eh?”.

Still not looking up fully I said “Yeah!”.

With that he quickly added “But hasn’t it been almost two months since the book got released, and are you reading it only now?”

Now, I HAD to look-up, holding the page I was reading with my index finger on it I closed the book and told in an irrefutable voice “I am reading this for the third time”

He didn’t stop there either, instead continued on asking “Ohhhh…So, you were one of those that pre-booked, stood on those long lines on first day and got the book? But why do you read it three times?”

I was really irritated now, “Do I really have to get into the details of how I procured this book now? Does it really matter? I read it more than once because I like it, is there a problem with that?”

A little flabbergasted with that reply, he said “No, I was too curious to know what’s there in that book to be read so passionately?”

With piling up anger showing its shade of red on my face I retorted back saying “What’s NOT there in that book for NOT to be read so passionately? And in any case you wouldn’t know about a Book unless you read it!”

He shrugs his shoulders and says “whatever” and walks away. And I go back to my book.

It was in hindsight that I realized that may be he wasn’t even trying to mock me, but was genuinely trying to make a conversation with me, which I overlooked to understand and reciprocate in a normal manner.

Phew! I hope he forgives my nutty sorta behavior and with any luck we may get to meet and have some decent talking soon!

Over the Weekend...

You are hurt and you have none of your friends around to console you.

You just met with an accident and your deep bruises and wounds are still raw.

You are hit with flu, fever and dry cough and your lungs are tired of the excessive strain laid on them due to non-stop coughing.

You have just found a new home and you have to shift before Monday.

You are in the process of shifting and its raining like mad!

You are tired and worn-out when your ex-landlords try to sound as mean as they can be with returning the rent-deposit or advance however you may wish to call it.

So much more on the same lines, but no better than experiencing it than writing it!